“Why are you afraid to forgive?” my friend asked.
“Well…I’m afraid if I forgive, then they’ll just get away with everything they did to me.”
Instead of forgiving, I had decided to hold it all in, against the people who had done me wrong. I really thought that if I forgave them, they would get away with it. I felt that if I didn’t forgive them, I was in some way holding them accountable.
Yet it was during this time that I lived with depression, anger and fear. I could barely sleep at all, and when I did it wasn’t well. I kept what had been done to me in the back of my mind at all times, dwelling on it, hoping the people who had hurt me would get what they deserved.
Holding all of that stuff in and dwelling on it was doing me more harm than it was to the people who had hurt me. By dwelling on it, not letting it go and keeping it in my mind, I was letting myself be hurt over and over by reliving the pain every time I thought about it.
Forgiveness is a choice. We choose to forgive, and then the process of healing begins. If we choose to hang on to all of that stuff like I did in the past, we are in direct disobedience to the word of God (Matthew 6:15).
God knows your hurts. He knows how deeply those things broke your heart. He knows the pain of misunderstanding and betrayal. He knows and He cares. But What He told us to do, is to forgive. It is in forgiving others that we will find true freedom for ourselves.
I spent many years holding grudges, being angry, and hurting inside. Without forgiving the ones who had hurt me, I don’t think I ever would have known peace. Don’t spend your life being angry, forgive, and choose to be free.
Father I pray for everyone who reads this. I ask that you would help them choose to forgive. I ask in Jesus name that you would lead them in the process of healing. Give them divine appointments with people who will help them in the process of healing and restoration. Give them wisdom in relationships and keep them safe. Help them to know when and who to ask for help. Restore their lives I pray, In Jesus name, Amen.